For me, boundaries have always been my “weakest link”. I used to think that setting a boundary meant I had to create a barrier that would isolate me from other people, which was not something I ever wanted. As an empath, I value connection, compassion and love. But how I acted that out was by merging with others and losing myself in the process. Then I would end up feeling depleted and drained.
When you don’t have boundaries, you end up either having so much empathy for another that you lose touch with your own wisdom, as I did. Alternately you might erect barriers to “protect your space,” or ”take care of yourself” and end up being isolated or disconnected. This is the burden of the “lone wolf” or the “I am a rock, I am an island” mentality — also draining and maybe a little depressing.
Over my years of practice with energetic and martial arts, I discovered that in very concrete and literal ways, healthy boundaries are actually a key to true intimacy and connection —whether in personal close relationships or in work or business contexts. When those boundaries are clear, clean and energetic, you can truly connect with others in authentic ways. Then true synergy kicks in with an enormous amount of vitality — the kind of empowerment that gets you up and out to do the things you know you are meant to do in your life.
Vicki Dello Joio, founder ofThe Way of Joy: A Spiritual Fitness Program, is a teacher, speaker and performing artist. Integrating over 40 years of Chi Kung practice with other martial arts as well as her work in Yoga, Feldenkreis, physical fitness and theater, Vicki has developed a dynamic set of tools to increase awareness, transform obstacles into opportunities and enhance creative potential. Book: The Way of Joy, CD: Short Meditations for a Busy Life.
My mother and I have a long tradition of going to the movies on Christmas Day. This year, because Mama didn’t feel up to going out, she, my wife Sherry, and I stayed home and watched a DVD of the Woody Allen’s movie, “Midnight in Paris”.
As is true in so many of his films, this one was a combination of comedy and wrestling with philosophical differences about the meaning of life. A writer finds himself traveling back in time to the Paris of Hemingway, Picasso, Gertrude Stein and others — what he imagines is the “Golden Age” only to find the people there longing for a different “Golden Age”. He eventually realizes that he wants to live in the present, not the past.
The movie made me think about what it means to embrace the “now”, to follow through on truly owning the present. For me that includes looking at our beliefs, usually called resolutions at this time of year, and bringing them to life in Real Time. Yet, so many people I know have given up on making New Year’s Resolutions – they tend to dissipate so quickly and who needs more disappointment in their lives – especially in ourselves?
I think that is why I first began to offer my annual Nourish the Flame: From Resolutions to Results event. I believe that setting intentions, seeing our big visions, and feeling the excitement of what might be possible allows those intentions to lodge in our unconscious. This, in turn, transforms the present into something we want.
Given that science is now proving that much of the experiences we have and the choices we make is governed by this “underground” part of ourselves, I think it is crucial that we have tools to reprogram those settings for success. That’s why I’m so motivated to share with you some of the tried-and-true-tested methods I have used to help my clients (and myself) transform past and future dreams into current reality again and again.
AND have fun at the same time.
The qi (energy) practices you are going to learn are powerful in themselves. But when you have a large number of folks moving qi together on this day, you’ll feel how you’re going to blow the roof (and your glass ceiling) off 2016. If you can’t imagine what I mean, check out this video.
Registrations are still open, with new people signing up every day, so be sure to grab your seat soon. After all, if planning ahead is one of your resolutions for the New Year, you can start TODAY by clicking here. 😉 Ready to set 2016 on fire?
“Renegade-Woo” Vicki Dello Joio, founder of The Way of Joy: A Spiritual Fitness Program, brings together East Coast Attitude and West Coast energy consciousness as a master teacher, transformative speaker and performing artist. Integrating over 40 years of Chi Kung practice with other martial arts as well as her work in Yoga, Feldenkreis, physical fitness and theater, Vicki has developed a dynamic set of tools to transform obstacles into opportunities and enhance creative potential. Book: The Way of Joy, CD: Short Meditations for a Busy Life.
This is one of my favorite practices to do, especially at this time of year, during the winter season. In fact, I always incorporate it into my annual Nourish the Flame: From Resolutions to Results because it makes such a synergistic contribution to the practices and tools I share.
My wish for you, as we move into the New Year, is vision and sustainability. This little practice might do the trick
Please tell me what happens after you have tried this for 1 day. And it’s not too late to register for Nourish the Flame. If you are coming, do go ahead and begin this water exercise today and support your qi field to maximize the benefits of what we will be doing together on Dec. 30.
“Renegade-Woo” Vicki Dello Joio, founder of The Way of Joy: A Spiritual Fitness Program, brings together East Coast Attitude and West Coast energy consciousness as a master teacher, transformative speaker and performing artist. Integrating over 40 years of Chi Kung practice with other martial arts as well as her work in Yoga, Feldenkreis, physical fitness and theater, Vicki has developed a dynamic set of tools to transform obstacles into opportunities and enhance creative potential. Book: The Way of Joy, CD: Short Meditations for a Busy Life.
The season of Winter calls on the wisdom of the Water element, in its myriad of forms from raging rivers to delicate crystalline snowflakes. In the same way, you can cultivate your ability to adapt and flow as you move into the hush of the season.
Associated in Traditional Chinese Medicine with the kidneys, winter is the season to nourish and support this important organ, which regulates and balances water and fluids in your body.
The seat of the adrenal glands, which produce the fight / flight response, the kidneys are associated with the emotion of fear. Whether that fear has to do with growing fully into your own power or wrestling with your “inner critics” or external challenges, this is a perfect time of year to turn and face those voices, while keeping the inner flame of your consciousness alight to sustain your vision of where you want to go.
For example: Registrations have been pouring in for my upcoming New Year’s event Nourish the Flame: From Resolutions to Results. A number of participants from last year’s event have been reporting some amazing results they manifested this past year because of their experience in that one short afternoon. One participant even told me that this is her VERY FAVORITE event of the year. All Great Stuff, right? Yet I find myself still needing to call on my commitment not to get bogged down by my own old fears and limiting beliefs. Guess it’s time to nourish my kidneys, get over it and get On with it. You in?
SAVE THE DATE! DEC 30 Nourish the Flame: A FREE Winter Workshop to Transform Ideas into Reality and Resolutions into Results. Bring in the Joy for 2016!
“Renegade-Woo” Vicki Dello Joio, founder of The Way of Joy: A Spiritual Fitness Program, brings together East Coast Attitude and West Coast energy consciousness as a master teacher, transformative speaker and performing artist. Integrating over 40 years of Chi Kung practice with other martial arts as well as her work in Yoga, Feldenkreis, physical fitness and theater, Vicki has developed a dynamic set of tools to transform obstacles into opportunities and enhance creative potential. Book: The Way of Joy, CD: Short Meditations for a Busy Life.
I don’t know about you, but I think this time of year is complex. Invitations pour in to be “out, about, and social” while, at the same time, the days are shorter and the Natural World is reminding us that this is a time for conservation, hibernation and retreat.
One of the ways I ride these contradictions as the holiday season catapults us towards the end of the year is a qigong form called the Crystal Generator, which is a featured practice I offer annually at my Nourish the Flame event. Although I can’t offer the whole thing here, I think if you take about 3 minutes to try out this excerpt, you may find, as I do, that it will become a key sustaining tool to thrive through the season.
Nourish the Flame: A Winter Workshop toTransform resolutions into Real-Time Results
